There is a strange space between living and waiting…

I’m still a wife

I’m still a mom

I’m still doing school drop offs and pick ups, packing lunches, driving to practices, doing laundry, answering calls and texts, sitting in the bleachers and so much more.

But underneath all of that- I’m waiting.

Waiting for a phone call that could change everything.

Waiting for a new heart.

Waiting for more time.

And here’s what no one really tells you about waiting: it doesn’t pause your life. The world keeps spinning. The to-do list still exists. The kids still need rides and help. Dinner still needs to be made. Laundry still needs to be washed. Life doesn’t dim itself because you’re walking through something heavy, something dark.

Sometimes I feel strong.

Sometimes I feel scared.

Many times I feel both in the same breath.

This season of my life (my transplant journey) has changed how I see everything. Time feels louder. Love feels deeper. The small things feel sacred. The big things feel even more sacred. I don’t rush hugs or I love you’s anymore. I sit a little longer. I watch a little closer. I pray a lot harder.

Waiting has taught me this- control is an illusion but faith is a choice!

And let me tell you right now, I choose faith.

If you’re in your own, waiting season- whether it’s health, heartbreak, uncertainty, or something no one else sees- you are not alone here. Waiting is hard but sometimes waiting is also where strength is built.

The beat goes on- even here.